If you only knew by Jea Hawkins

I love books about romanticized writers. And ”If you only knew” by Jea Hawkins is just about a romanticized writer, who has sworn off love and is about to get a big load of passion and love.

Sabrina Covell is an accomplished literary novelist who lives în Martha´s Vineyard în her grandparents’ home. She wouldn’t have sworn off love, if it wouldn`t have been for her sister`s love and leave them attitude towards all her lovers. Sabrina has been burned twice before with some of Miranda˙s ex-girlfriends who only wanted Miranda or who needed a burst in their lives being seen next to a celebrity.  The two sisters couldn˙t be more different both in the way they are living their lives and in their appearance. While Miranda is a power obsesessed and ruthless anchorwoman living în Boston, presenting the news on a național channel, Sabrina loves her silent and lonely life on the island . Also, Miranda’s look is flawless with every gray white hair is at it’s place and having an ”I rule your world’’ attitude, she is a real womanizer. While Sabrina’s corkscrew wild hair and her loose attitude, reflect the fact that she has no desire for new conquests. With no luck in love, Sabrina is devoted to her writing. Yet, somewhere inside, she is still hoping for a kindred spirit, a deep and down to earth person with artistical emphasis who may be able to sweep her off her feet.

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Blythe Jensen is a young beautiful woman with artistic skills. Her dream is to be a photographer who surprises the real life of people. She is a blonde, beautiful maiden, with an almost hippie feel, yet her way of seeing life, people, art and her desires in photographing the real people who are Marta’s Vineyard, reveal her true nature. Yet, she remains a mystery to Sabrina.

I believe that their first encounter as it it set în the storyline was a real success in keeping the reader in the shadows.

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Sabrina wakes up one morning with Blythe sipping coffee in her kitchen, truly believing she is one of Miranda’s conquests left behind shamelessly by her sister after a night of wild passion.

Yet, Miranda seems to have a plan for Sabrina, playing her one of the most cruel jokes so far, even for her sister, basically moking Sabrina in an interview for a magazine and offering Blythe to Sabrina as a rewarding fake relationship partner for the summer.

This was such a brilliant idea.

Sabrina doesn’t want this and she is furious with Miranda, yet she is trapped at the irony of the situation of her new book release in the fall, as her publisher pushes her to have a relationship at that point, because of Miranda’s shit interview.

Sabrina has no choice and allows Blythe to stay for the summer and even more as an appologize for her sister’s behavior she offers to show Blythe the real people who make Martha’s Vineyard what it is. During all this time she discovers Blythe beyond her beautiful appearance and sees her artistic soul and kindred spirit, just like her own.

I liked Blythe’s mystery, it keeps the reader anxious to read further and to read it faster.

I loved their lovemaking, each and every time. It was suprising how sometimes Sabrina disliked the fact that this might be a summer fling, not a real romance, by imagining she is one of her characters. It was such a brilliant choice to reveal her fears. But, step by step, those fears seem irrelevant and Sabrina can’t believe she got involved with one of Miranda’s conquests again and slowly falling in love with Blythe.

shay and devon kiss

The turning point is really amazing, I haven’t expected it, of course, and it brings light within Blythe’s mysterious ways.

shay and devon kiss2

Also, I think Miranda’s character was amazing. She did exactly what was expected from her at every stringent moment. She seems so much alike  Miranda Priestly from ”The Devil wears Prada’’.

How will the summer fling end?

What sick joke has yet again Miranda played to Sabrina?

Who is Blythe?

Are Blythe’s feelings real?

Will Sabrina be able to forgive?

Excerpts from the book:

“Of course, all the ladies fawned over Miranda. Not only was she Boston’s highest paid anchorwoman. She also managed to look perfect no matter what, every silver hair falling straight and into place, regardless of wind or rain, heat or cold. Sabrina, on the other hand, had to shove back her unruly mop of coppery-brown corkscrew curls to reveal her slightly freckled face. Both women had different standards to live up to. Miranda’s were far more stringent and demanding, while Sabrina’s remained loose and fluid. Being a literary novelist had its advantages, including never-ending intellectual discourse with her friends and peers, and an expectation that Sabrina would be… eccentric, to say the least. With their night and day differences, it was no wonder Miranda loved to cause trouble for Sabrina. Not that it made Sabrina want to elevate.”

“That’s a poetic way to put it but, yes, I think it’s true.” Sabrina fought the urge to edge closer to Blythe. In her imagination, she was kissing her to see if she tasted something on those lips that was all Cape Cod – salt from the air, sea, or sand. Those flavors would be there, along with something sweet, like ice cream or taffy, and always the sharp taste of inevitable heartbreak.

“The ocean?” Sabrina asked, folding her arms and leaning against the cupola. “Mmhm. Once that’s in someone’s blood, there is nothing else.” The way Blythe lifted her face to the air and closed her eyes, Sabrina knew she’d experienced that kind of heartbreak. The kind where someone loved you… but not enough.

“Do you want to walk with me tomorrow?” Sabrina asked, still holding her close. She wasn’t ready to lose Blythe’s radiant warmth just yet. “I can show you the things no one ever bothers to look for on Martha’s Vineyard.” Blythe’s smile was bright, her eyes crinkling with it. “Yes, please.”

“Sad, but that’s the story that won me my first literary award.” Something tightened in Sabrina’s chest and she pushed away from the tree. How could she possibly explain herself to anyone and have them understand? “Anyway, it’s not about the awards, either. It’s about life’s what-ifs and imagining the path someone followed, and how we as humans can relate to that. All writers want to make their readers feel something, whether it’s joy or sorrow, or something else. If readers feel something for my characters, that means I made someone that doesn’t even exist real and relatable, and maybe even beloved for a short while.”

Sabrina stroked her palm along the soft valley of her sex, eliciting a moan from Blythe. Everything within her demanded to hear that sound again and again and again, until Blythe went hoarse with pleasure. She could do this by stepping into character, setting aside everything but her own desire. “I want to taste you,” Sabrina purred against Blythe’s half-open mouth. “Sabrina…” “I’m going to make you shake with ecstasy until you can’t stand it anymore.” Sabrina dropped to her knees, hands bunching Blythe’s skirt up and over her hips to reveal her target. Even when they went their separate ways in a couple more weeks after the launch party, Sabrina would make sure Blythe never forgot her. “I love the way you look in my bed, your hair across my pillows, the way you smile at me. But right now, we aren’t going to make love. I’m going to fuck you against the wall until you can’t take it anymore.” Blythe moaned again and Sabrina straightened to touch her lips to her neck, her collarbone, and then her chest. The dress was too tight for her to get into this way, so she glided her hands over Blythe’s breasts to find her nipples. Both budded for her and Sabrina pinched them hard enough to elicit another helpless whimper. She slanted her mouth down over Blythe’s to cut off the sound, to remind her who controlled the moment. When she drew back, Blythe blinked at her, all sweetness and innocence. On her face, at least. Sabrina tamped down the renewed suspicion that the same qualities didn’t dwell in her heart. “


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